Lola

Two Peas in a Pod

No. Not Lola and Dahl. Me. And this weatherman. Just watch. I don't know how he went back after the first trauma. Is he made of steel? I just think STOIC when I see him. LD

And they say they don't come with instructions....

Technically they are right (I don't know how I feel about they, they come across as knowitalls, but sometimes, just sometimes, I want to be one of the theys....) but I've found a mighty good set I think every parent should have!

While many of you may think these are not very comprehensive, ie, the feeding of the breastfed baby, mum or dad, where they don't include bottle fed babies, to me it's clear. They're saying it's best if Mum breastfeeds but before a bottle, give Dad a go.

Got it?

Aight then. Get your thinking caps on, pen and paper, whatever and get ready to be amazed.

Oh yes, but before you go finish that glass of milk. No need to have it come out your nose now.

I have to say that some of the don'ts have worked wonders for me. When J, Lola or Dahl refused to calm down, a bit o whiskey and placing one finger in each corner of their mouths and lifting into a smile certainly calmed me down. And made me smile.                                                                           

Bonding with baby, or your child over a hot cup of coffee is a FABULOUS idea.

I have, on numerous occasions, tested my children milk bottles by sticking my tongue in to them. This method works incredibly well. In fact, I do it when serving coffee to a friend, or dinner to a dinner guest. Can't be too safe these days with all of those lawsuits flying left and right! 

While this is a beginning please do not allow the donts to disuade you from trying them. Only you know your baby, and let's face it, with desperate times come desperate measures. 

Honey! It's dinner time, whip out that man nipple!

Love, peace and we've hit the gold mine in parenting answers!

LD

Notice*****LD is not advocating use of any of these parenting techniques. Merely displaying them for your viewing pleasure. ( Those attorneys make me say that. Soooo don't do the donts. Okay? Unless you have and it's work, then leave me a message because I've got to hear this.)

China....production going strong even in the 60s

but really can you blame us for buying all of their little tchotchkes? I mean they're adorable!
If I had spare GOLD around I would have Pay Pal-ed for these pale faced bubs lickity- split.

You can buy this pretty family because I am going to tell you where to get them. It's hard, you know. I feel like I'm giving up family members but since you're in my 'circle' I know they'll live a good life with you. Hurry. They are in a back alley. Behind a large green dumpster is a door with a sign that says, VaudevilleVintage. It's what they're calling the homes these days....

Now hush. Go, and be off with the orphans before I change my mind. But forever remember your promise to me! Do NOT SPLIT UP THE SIBLINGS! -LD

St. Patrick- my kid's no fool

Dear St. Patrick, I think you're a nice enough guy, and really appreciate the fact that you're trying to get children to eat a more healthy fare but this is not the way.
My kid's no fool. You know that old saying ,' You can't bulls**t a bulls**tter?' No, I guess it wouldn't fit in this instance......um, we're no fools. Got it? Not take your green peppers and stop trying to pass them off as four leaf clovers. Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice......you will NOT make a mockery of my children! Momma may have allowed it with me but now, older and wiser, I am on to the game brother!
LD
For those of you interested in trying this sham of a clover, it won't bring you luck, I ate a pot, about the size that would hold a hefty portion of gold too, full of them, and all I got was indigestion, but if you're bull headed them click through. The piccy will lead you strait to the recipe. Though should it work for you.....remember who loves you best and who showed you the way. ME baby! Me!

Don't do it Lydia!

I did it once. Had long hair one day and decided that it would be a good idea to cut it off and donate it. I did it. I looked like a puffalump. Only worse. I was perusing Etsy and came across this beautiful doll. I see so much of my young self in her story.

Her name is Lydia. She wants to donate her hair to Lots of Locks. Yet she's not read to part with it just yet. Why ye ask? She's afraid her face will look round. I feel like I can't breathe. As if I'm watching some horror flick and the black guy decides to leave the group to go for help. We all know he's not coming back. I feel like screaming! Not you! Haven't you ever SEEN a horror film? The black guy never survives. It's terrible the society we live in where film makers kill them off like flies. This is how I am feeling about Lydia. SO helpless. Trapped, if you will, on the other side of the computer screen waiting with bated breath to see what happens next. Wanting, desperately, to warn her of the danger that lay ahead. Wanting to tell her that I have been there. I was the black guy that no one warned. I cut my hair. I looked like a pufferfish on steroids, only rounder and a bit more swollen. I want to desperately tell her to stay with the group. The long haired group. Let someone else go for help. Someone really skinny who will look good with a pixie haircut.

The anxiety is building inside of me......I want to scream -LD

If you happen to be one of the skinnies, please disregard this post and donate your locks to Locks of love. It's a great organization, and you'd be helping someone in need of a happiness boost. Maybe I didn't look that awful......

And for those of you offended please note: I have nothing against short hair, round faces, nor black guys. Film makers that kill them off? That's a different post

Caught my eye...

Laundry is not exactly on the top of my fun things to do list. I like pretty things. Looking at them, trying my hand at making them, all around being surrounded by them. I'm also not the best at doing laundry. Not much into those pesky rules: don't mix colors with whites, blah blah blah. Can you imagine how many more loads this would take?! I couldn't possibly do that to my mother in law. Oh yes. She's the saint that does most of my laundry. She comes over on the weekend and spends the night and does a marathon. Of course during the week, Lola and Dahl do sometimes need something washed and I'm all they have.....

Anyway, I found these adorable washing instruction plaques. I think they're so cheery it might make me want to spend more time in my laundry/garage/ gym/storage facility/extended pantry room. Have a looksey. AND REMEMBER TO KEEP AN EYE ON THE LEFT HAND COLOUMN. There you will find things that have recently caught my eye. They may not be for everyone, but they may be for you.

I feel an urge to decorate do some laundry...LD

Sometimes when you aren't looking

things just fall into your lap...or as in this case your laptop. I was searching for a site I saw a while back with a lady that eternally falls through a sky of bubbles because there are days I feel like I'm falling. And like this lady, I feel like I am forever contorting myself trying to get things done, organized, and just right. Or right enough. On this site you can use your mouse to control where this gal falls or just allow cyber nature to take it's course and sit back and enjoy.

So whilst I was looking for this site I found one where Hillary Clinton is endlessly falling. I'll bet she's feeling somewhat like this now. And so I thought I would share. There is also one for George Bush should you prefer to watch him fall. I think it would be great to have the ability to add any face to this body. Might be fun, kind of like a cyber voodoo doll where no one gets hurt and you get your frustrations out.

With great ideas like these I should run for President. LD

You know that person who's always there?

I've always wanted to be that person. I try. I make myself a bit crazed doing it too. So this little pair of felines really touched me. From me to you. How I feel. That is all. Thank you. Good bye. Stop reading. The post is over. My fingers are getting tired and if you were any kind of friend you'd stop this cruelty right now. Exhale.......thank you. Love, LD

Dieting? Yummy, look away!

Or maybe not. I think that maybe this is the way to go. At first I was considering these delicious foods for Lola and Dahl. To play with. Now I think I will go shopping and buy me a pantry full! Stock my refridgerator with the goodies. And tout their goodness from the mountain tops!

'Soy-sage and Egg biscuit breakfast sanwich' by MermaidSparkle

Just think. They don't spoil and since I'm into this whole organic kick, what's more organic than felt wool? And imagine my waist. Reappearing! Now that's a thought to chew on.

'Protein dinner? Fish, mushrooms and all things healthy' for your dining pleasure by GOBUGGY

If you're looking for something sweet, something that can spoil, look no further. I recommend to you, Rowena's.

'Alleluia! Alleluia! Alleeeeeeluuuuuiahhhhhhhhhhhh!'

Apologies for the interruption, the heavens seem to open up and a chorus of angels begin singing when I mention... well  you know who's cakes.

She makes the best not made of felt cakes this side of a computer screen! I have purchased them for babyshowers, bridal showers, my daughters' first birthday party, and I send them every year, religiously, to my childrens' pediatricians, and other very special doctors that treated my risky pregnancy with Lola and Dahl. I love their cakes, like the Earth loves the Sun's warmth. Probably more with that whole hole in the ozone layer issue and all.... LD

I so identify with this woman....

Birdwoman that is.

Mr. LD comes into a room and I turn around just like this. Like I was on a little perch......

And so I have found the perfect way to show I care and I think, ladies, this may just be the perfect way to show your honey that you care.

Actually, the card may be nice too!

If you're interested clicksey on the picsey.

Scouting out the best for you and for me, LD